It doesnt have to be that way

It seems many people have masochistic tendencies and the media is doing much to promote it. I once saw a Nigerian tv series and a young female character bragged to her friends that her boyfriend only hit her because he was a 'real man'. The worse kind is emotional and verbal abuse. There's nothing more demoralizing than a downcast from the person you are involved with. Sometimes their words begin to define you. They tell you what you are fit for and what is fit for you, you keep metamorphosing until they finally leave and then you are a whole other insect, and cannot even find your footing. But God dey sha.

I used to think that way also, I mean after seeing Eminem's "Love the way you lie" music video. I thought, while lying down in my bed shared with three buxom sisters at the peak of puberty and a skinny one; that such a love was the greatest. Bitter-Sweet, the best taste the world could offer. Because too sweet can be boring, too bitter was, well just too bitter.

So many a time, I had recommended to male friends to slap ladies they were in relationships with into their right senses. God forgive my ignorance. Sometimes I had even instigated a fight, just to make up back with a person I was in a relationship with. I must have been so deceived by the Devil's idea of love. 

Love can be what it is. Just love and sweet to extremities. A man can respect and honour his wife and she can reciprocate and they will not be boring. 

I do not appeciate disagreements so much anymore. When a whole tears into half to fight, it is always against themselves. But in oneness it is against an external force. 

I wish I learnt earlier that a small residue of pain and tears do not add more flavor to the pot if love. It just makes it something else. What I think is, you can go through pain because of love but you should not go through pain in love.